Jesus Christ this year is flying by.
September marks the back to uni drum roll- or rather, death march. As much as I love uni and my course, I do not love the work load.
Regardless, I’m excited. In a few short weeks, I’ll be back to training as an RA – which doesn’t mean much. I’ve done the training last year, so I pretty much know what to expect. Really, I’m just excited to meet the new RA’s and to have a change of pace.
Whilst I have enjoyed my time working in an office, I have to admit that it is mentally exhausting me. All I can think about is falling asleep at the end of the day – so it’s not really a surprise my sleepless nights have returned.
Half of me feels like I’m in a better place – maybe not creatively, but definitely emotionally. Then the other half of me reminds me that I’ve not done half the things I wanted to.
I wanted to spend as many weekends as possible in London, exploring and falling in love with the city. Whilst, yes, I have explored the city I’ve called my home the last two years, I’ve actually spent more time on a train to my real home than in London. I didn’t realise how much I would miss my Mum and Dad until I stayed away for the summer.
I’ve also started a bullet journal. I’ve had it for less than a month, but I really like the idea of a habit tracker and the fact that you create your own diary. If something doesn’t work one month, you can alter it and try again the next. I decide what I want to track and keep on top of, and I bloody love it.
For my habit tracker, I tried to categorise my habits into good, bad, and neutral – partly to shame myself into doing more good habits. Whilst it is good to keep track of all the bad things I do – mainly all the junk food I eat – at the same time it’s not that great. When I decide to have a packet of crisp, my thoughts automatically go “well if I have to mark it down, I might as well have another packet – or four” which probably isn’t an ideal thing. But then I did make a promise to myself that I would no longer by crappy food for the flat – once it’s gone, it’s gone. So far that’s worked quite well.
In order to gorge myself still, I’ve tried to pick up more fruit. So far my go to treats are the royal fruit (or at least they are to me)- oranges, apples, and grapes. I have them every day and have even started bringing them to work as a treat. But the great part is I’ve even managed to pick up some new fruits – fruits that I have previously never tried before. Well, except for bananas.
When I was little, I used to love bananas. I remember devouring them like no tomorrow. But now, even the smell of them make me feel ill. I thought, maybe I’m just over-reacting – it definitely wouldn’t be the first time, either. So I bought some. And I had one. And gagged three times whilst eating it.
So yeah, banana’s are not my friend. The texture of it in my mouth sends shivers down my back. It grosses me out. So I guess my optimism about being able to enjoy bananas again was short lived.
Other fruits I’ve tried so far have been cantaloupe, peaches, and nectarines. The only one I’m certain I’ll be buying again is the Cantaloupe – which is so sweet and wonderful. It reminds me of my childhood.
Still on my list to try are cherries, blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, and papaya. But who know’s what I’ll enjoy at the end of the day. I’m picky about everything I eat, but at least I’m trying.
Anyway, my month goals are what they usually are – to keep trying. To keep trying to write, to keep trying to eat healthy, to keep trying to be positive. And that’s all I can really do.
I wrote this at the end of August. I know, I know. It’s late. We’re nearly at the end of September. Honestly? Work has been manic and I haven’t had much time to do anything except breath when I get home. The good news is that after this weekend I’ll no longer be working full time… well, unless you call being a student a full-time job (which I probably should). Finally, I’ll be able to do the one thing I love more than anything else on this earth – Sleep! Haha, in all seriousness, I’m really looking forward to my final year at university and bringing you all along for the ride.